At the beginning of the book Genly had little understanding of not only Estraven but their society. He feels the need to put him in familiar boxes, rather sexist boxes, “I thought that at the table Estraven’s performance had been womanly, all charm […] it was impossible to think of him as a woman, that dark, ironic, powerful presence…” (Le Guin, 12-13). Genly is trying to fit Genly into our societies gender roles, and it’s just not going to happen. And because he is unable to understand him without the use of gender, he is not able to fully trust him until he starts to understand their society. I would argue that Genly never truly understands Estraven. “I held him, crouching there in the snow, while he died.” (305) When Estraven died I truly believe that he loved him. But even though there was a obvious connection between them, it was not obvious to Genly. He did not want to admit to himself that he loved Estraven because that would mean he wouldn’t know what box to put his sexuality into. He denied it until the moment Estraven died and then still doubted it. He couldn’t understand his feelings and therefor didn’t understand Estraven. As for Estraven understanding Genly it is impossible to tell but I believe he could not understand someone who did not understand themselves.
Cats and Books 